I Will Stay


unsplash-logoRoman Kraft "My eyes widen with knowing, as a car pulls up and windows roll down. Somehow we have come to meet at this fateful stoplight. When it turns green, we'll go from a path apart to a path enjoined. This couldn't have been organized by anything less than the Stars. Comfort. Joy. Adventure. Life has become suddenly delicious and safe in the arms of a soulmate.

I am a zombie still dying her own death. The life inside me has only tears to offer the world. I don't want to be here. Not without him. I try to escape and I fail. I hid from so much, by focusing on him and now it is boiling up, lava turned volcanic ash, and burning the joy from my life. Will I ever know anything else?

Walking. Lots and lots of walking Trees, sand, rivers, lakes, sunlight, rain. This world has so much beauty for me, that has nothing to do with me. I get to be a bystander to beauty. But wait. It's also inside of me. I feel it here and there, this light growing like a sunrise, imploring me to merge with all the potent colors of the world. There....there, now. I have made it to some unknown wholeness and connection. An utterance of divinity has seeped into my bones and I will stay. I will stay until my bones sing beauty as they walk. I will stay."